Monthly Archives: August 2013

… Said No Teen, Ever

August 26, 2013Linda's Postswriting

Yes, Mom, I’d love it if you came to the concert with us!

… said no teen, ever.

* * *

A strong teen voice is probably the one ingredient most likely to make or break a YA novel. So how does a writer get it?

While “voice” is one of those qualities that can be hard to define and even harder to develop, there are some basic things writers can do:

Avoid overly manufactured “teen talk.” Teens have highly sensitive fake-o-meters. Adult-manufactured “teen talk” sets those meters spinning. Yes, each new generation of teen-age speech has its own slang, its own cadence, its own set of cultural references. But a little bit goes a long way. Overdo it, and you come off as unrealistic at best and grating at worst.

Listen to how teens (and people in general) talk. This is especially important for writing dialog (which is different from voice, but which does contribute to your writer’s voice). People don’t speak in complete sentences. They use contractions. They interrupt each other in conversation. They use shorter sentences when they’re excited and longer sentences when they’re waxing poetic. Your characters should, too.

Don’t generalize. I hope this goes without saying, but … teens are people, too! Not all teens are alike. In fact, no two are alike. So give them their own personalities, dreams, failings, and flaws.

Think like a teen. Writing with a teen voice is less about using the latest “hot” phrases and more about seeing the world and responding to it the way a teen sees it and responds to it. Remember how it felt to be a teen? Good. That’s all you need! Drawing on your own feelings and experiences is the best way to make your teen voice real and believable.

* * *

And now, just for fun, some things teens would NEVER say, as contributed by real-live teens (and a few former teens) from my church’s youth group:
I wish my curfew was earlier.
I wish there was less food in the house.
I wish I didn’t have a smart phone.
I wish my internet connection was slower.
(Kyle Snoich)

I wish school was 10 hours a day.
The school lunches are so yummy! I could eat them all the time!
(Andy Vest)

I wish I had to wake up every day at 6 a.m.
I wish there was no such thing as football.
I wish there was no such thing as summer.
(Thomas Crowson)

Video games are boring.
I wish teachers were super mean.
TV shows from the ’90s are so boring.
I love paying for textbooks.
(Teresa Artigas)

All high school girls are really nice to everyone.
No one is ever insecure.
I just love doing chores.
I’m not attached to my cell phone.
(Emily Gallihugh)

Yes! Another essay assignment!
(Andrew Dietz)

I wish the driving age was 21.
I wish we had year-round school.
I wish texting had never been invented.
My parents need to be more strict.
(Billy Vaughan)

I wish I had more homework.
I really enjoy cleaning my room.
I sure hope I get to wake up early tomorrow!
Let’s go to the library! (Aw, that one makes me sad.)
I hate it when people text me.
(Nick Yother)

I want to be a telemarketer when I grow up.
(Laurie Cummins Morris)

Why I Said ‘Yes’ to the (Small) Press

August 19, 2013Linda's Postspublishing, Swoon Romance, The Funeral Singer

There’s been a lot of talk in the publishing world this week about the advantages and potential disadvantages of signing with a small press. For those of you who aren’t as familiar with the publishing world, a “small press” means any company that isn’t part of the Big 5–Harper Collins, Penguin Putnam, Random House, Simon & Schuster, and Time Warner. Some have gone so far as to suggest that in today’s environment, where self-publishing is such a readily available option, there’s no point in signing with a small press.

I can only speak for myself and my book, but here are the Top 5 things THE FUNERAL SINGER would lack if I’d decided to self-publish rather than sign with Swoon Romance:

A main character who remains likeable even at her worst. Mel becomes quite the diva about two-thirds of the way through the book. She’s hot, she’s famous, and she is oh, so much more than a mere funeral singer. But the reader can still root for her because Mel also is vulnerable. And that, my friends, is because my editor, Amy Garvey, pointed out ways I could make her vulnerable even at her worst. Had I self-published, I would not have had that editorial guidance and the story would not be as strong.
Its gorgeous cover. Have I told you how much I love the cover? Not sure what would have happened had I self-pubbed. I’m not a designer, so I would have had to hire one. Would he or she have come up with something equally as striking? Perhaps. But one thing is for sure: I would be poorer right now.
Cool promos. Such as having my first chapter published at the end of Lizzy Charles’ EFFORTLESS WITH YOU. A lot of people are reading Lizzy’s book. Within the first 24 hours of its release, it ranked within the top 2,000 books in the Kindle store and within the top 100 “coming of age books” within all of Amazon. As of this posting, it is all the way up to #69 in that category. That promotion, along with the mention of my book on USA Today’s romance blog, my cover reveal, and the blog tour that is scheduled upon the release of my book on September 24, are all publicity efforts I could not have achieved on my own.
The support of an amazing publishing family. I daresay this is something Swoon offers that not even the Big 5 can top. Its listserve is so full of author encouragement and advice, some days I worry that my inbox might explode.
A new manuscript that is about a third finished. I hit 18,000 words this week on my next book, meaning I’m about a third of the way through. No way would that have happened if I had decided to self-publish THE FUNERAL SINGER and had to deal with formatting it, hiring a cover designer, placing it on Amazon, doing all my own promotion, etc., etc. Having a publisher behind me to do all that allows me to do what I most want to do: write!

Please don’t get me wrong. I am not saying there is anything wrong with self-publishing. Many people are doing it and doing it well. Nor am I saying signing with a small press always offers advantages. Some small presses offer better services and better distribution than others. The key is to know what you’re getting into and to make an educated decision.

For THE FUNERAL SINGER, signing with Swoon Romance was a marriage made in heaven. And that’s why I said “yes” to the (small) press.

A Funeral Singer Word Cloud

August 15, 2013Linda's PostsThe Funeral Singer

There you have it … THE FUNERAL SINGER in one compact little cloud! Thanks to the magic of Wordle, we can see which words appear the most in my book.

Perhaps the thing that most pleased me when I pasted my manuscript into Wordle’s cloud-formation machine and hit “Go” was seeing that the word “just” didn’t appear in 400-point font, dwarfing all the other words. We all have our crutch words, and “just” is certainly mine. I have to work hard to avoid overusing it.

What’s your crutch word? Not sure? Try pasting your work into Wordle to find out!

Debut: Effortless with You

August 13, 2013Linda's PostsSwoon Romance

Congratulations to my fellow Swoon Romance author, Lizzy Charles, on today’s debut of her young adult romance novel, EFFORTLESS WITH YOU!

In less than 24 hours, Lizzy’s book is already ranked in the top 2,500 in Kindle sales and had seven 5-star reader reviews … impressive! And I can understand why:

School is out and Lucy is ready for the perfect summer: lazy days at the pool, invitations to the most exclusive parties, and romantic dates with her hot new boyfriend. That is, until she lands in trouble one too many times and her parents issue the ultimate punishment: a summer job. Suddenly, the summer can’t end fast enough.

To make matters worse, the job is painting houses with Justin, the most popular, egotistical guy in school. Spending all summer with Justin might be other girls’ dreams, but definitely not Lucy’s. After all, Justin is cocky, annoying, and a jerk. So what if he’s the most beautiful jerk Lucy’s ever seen? Or that his grin makes her forget she’s mad at the world? Or that maybe, just maybe, there’s more to Justin than Lucy realizes. Only one thing is certain: it won’t be the summer she wanted, but it might be exactly the one she needs.

Sounds fantastic, doesn’t it?

You can buy Lizzy’s book here on Amazon. And get to know her on her blog, her Facebook page, and her Twitter account.

(P.S. At the end of Lizzy’s book, Swoon is running a promo for THE FUNERAL SINGER … the full first chapter! So if you want a preview of my book, you should download Lizzy’s!)

What ‘The Bachelor’ Teaches Us About Romance

August 6, 2013Linda's Postsromance, The Bachelor

I’m a huge “Bachelor” fan, and proud of it. Yes, it’s trash TV, but it’s also romance, and competition, and conflict, and … oh, by the way, did you know that JUAN PABLO is going to be the next Bachelor?!?

But that’s a post for another time….

Now, where was I? Oh, yes, Juan Pablo.

No, wait … sorry.

I was about to explain what the “The Bachelor” can teach us about romance and love. Some might say it teaches us nothing, but those people are, perhaps, too fixated on “reality.” I would argue that it can teach us a great deal. For example:

You have to have a spark. Witness Shawntel, the funeral director from Brad’s season. And Ben’s season. (And yes, as the title of my book might suggest, I have a soft spot in my heart for funeral directors.) Shawntel was beautiful, smart, fun, adventurous—a total sweetheart. America loved her! But neither Brad nor Ben felt that special something that whispered, “This is the one!” Without that spark, you got nothin.’ Sad but true.

You can’t always trust your first impression. On Sean’s season, he gave Tierra the very first First Impression Rose. He loved her spark! Her spunk! Her spirit! Until Episode 7, when he finally realized she was psycho! On the other hand, Sean was a little freaked out by Lindsay, who showed up in a wedding dress and perhaps overdid it on the vino that first night. Yet, she turned out to be a real catch and made it to his final two.

Sometimes, love truly is blind (and perhaps deaf and dumb … emphasis on “dumb”). All of BachelorNation threw their collective stilettos at their TV sets when Ben picked Courtney. She was the woman we loved to hate, yet her model face, hair, and body, and her (however suspect) womanly charms had “Mr. Willing to Be Vulnerable” head over heels by the end of his season. Didn’t last. Saw that coming.

Sometimes it takes a break-up with Mr. Wrong before you can appreciate Mr. Right. (Alternate lesson: Sometimes Mr. Hard to Get is not actually a better catch than Mr. Right There in Front of You.) Fans know where I’m going with this one. Desiree was so blinded by her crush on Brooks that it wasn’t until he decided to leave the show that she realized her true feelings for Chris. Brooks was the aloof, unattainable one, while Chris was safe and steady. Sometimes safe and steady should win the race.

Talking about your kid ad nauseum might make you a great parent, but it makes you a boring “Bachelor” contestant—and yes, I’m looking at you, Emily. OK, so this isn’t really a lesson on romance, but I wanted to sneak that in here just in case Juan Pablo Googles his name and comes across this blog. Juan Pablo, I LOVE that you love your daughter but please, please, please don’t let the producers talk you into starting every episode with footage of her because that is just bad television.

And last but not least, everyone loves a fairytale ending. This is where you can’t let “reality” get in the way. We all know it doesn’t make the least bit of sense for someone to be in love with three different people right up until the last day of the show and then suddenly be certain of what he wants and ready to commit to her for the rest of his life. But this isn’t “reality.” This is “reality TV.” And that is exactly what happens, and what everyone wants to happen, and we all cheer when it does.

Though there may be a few of us out there who will have quite a different reaction if and when it happens for Juan Pablo.

The Funeral Singer Cover Reveal!

August 1, 2013Linda's PostsThe Funeral Singer

I have a lot to say about this cover, but since you’ll no doubt scroll past all my brilliant prose in your rush to see it, let’s get that part out of the way.

Deal?

Deal.

Drum roll, please …

Ta-da!

SEE! I told you … it’s gorgeous!!

You can go back and stare again for a while if you want. Believe me, I’ve been staring all week. Because it’s gorgeous! And cool, and intriguing, and amazing, and omigosh, I can’t stop staring!

Anyway, here’s the thing about this cover: I get to take most of the credit for it.

As a rule, authors don’t have much say in their cover. Publishers hire designers to design them, and the author is stuck with whatever they get.

But not Swoon Romance. Swoon asks their authors for their vision for the cover. Pretty cool! So about six weeks ago, Swoon publisher Georgia McBride asked me how I envisioned THE FUNERAL SINGER’s cover.

My response: “I’d rather not say.”

See, I work in communications and marketing, so I deal with designers a fair amount. For pretty much every project I’ve ever worked on, my “vision” has been one thing, and the designer’s has turned out to be quite another. A much, much, much better ‘nother.

So, yeah, after five years of writing and revising THE FUNERAL SINGER, I had a few preconceptions about what its cover might look like. But I had a feeling a designer’s vision might be much, much, much better.

And I was right … this is nothing AT ALL like what I’d imagined. It’s brilliant!

So you see, if it weren’t for me keeping my mouth shut, we might have a totally different and no doubt much lamer cover. You’re welcome.

(OK, fine, I’ll give Swoon a little credit, too. They rocked it. SERIOUSLY rocked it.)

Now that you’ve seen the cover, perhaps you’re wondering what this book is about. Well, you’re in luck! In addition to a cover, the book now has a publisher’s promo blurb:

* * *

Being a funeral singer was a dead-end job until it led her to him….

Seventeen-year-old Melanie Martin has witnessed her share of lame eulogies and uninspired epitaphs while singing part-time at her dad’s funeral home. She’s determined to be more than a funeral singer, more than someone’s “beloved wife” or “loving mother.”

When Mel’s impromptu rendition of “Amazing Grace” at a local rock star’s graveside service goes viral on YouTube, she becomes an Internet sensation, gains thousands of fans and followers, and snags a hot rock star boyfriend – Zed Logan, bass player for The Grime.

But instant fame isn’t easy – and neither is love. Especially when Mel realizes she’s falling for another guy – one who may just want her heart more than her voice.…

* * *

And that’s not all! In addition to a cover and a blurb, the book also now has a publication date: September 24! As in, less than two months away. So please, go mark your calendar and create a reminder for yourself on your phone and create an “appointment” in Outlook, because that is the day you will be able to download it. And then you can have your very own copy of this beautiful cover (and the rest of the book, too).